An excellent question was posed at bible study Tuesday night. We were discussing how Jesus tore the veil that separates us from God when he died on the cross; how we have complete and unhindered access to God. However, we allow things to come between us and the Lord. Here lies the question… what veil have I allowed to be hung in my heart? What keeps me from drawing intimately close to my God?
We took a moment to be silent and ask Him to reveal the veils that hide our hearts. God was undeniably clear with me. It is my fear of losing control over my life, loved ones, and circumstances that keeps me from being ever-close and abandoned to God.
The Lord has brought me a long way from the self-protecting, self-sufficient, controlling person that I became in my teenage years. While I have learned to let God have more and more control, I have not managed to escape the fear that comes when I do yield to Him. I still have to wrestle quite a bit to get to the place of letting go. The enemy pushes my deep-rooted fear buttons and tries to convince me that giving up control is too dangerous.
This morning, God revealed a breakthrough truth to me:
Surrendering and yielding to God does not mean that I am powerless.
It does not mean that I am completely lacking control in the situation. It is MY choice to surrender to God. It is MY decision to let Him have control over my family, finances, and future. Surrender is not a place of weakness or powerlessness. I am choosing to put my trust in the One that makes the best decisions for me and the ones I love. The One that knows the perfect solution to my quandries. The One who has a full provision for all of my needs. I am choosing to rest in the embrace of the One who cannot be moved.
Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.” Hebrews 12:28-29