is it insomnia, or an invitation?

At least a couple of times a week, I wake up around 3:00 AM. I usually wake with anxiety, suffocated by some issue pressing on my chest like a hundred-pound weight.

The anxiety is compounded with frustration at my sleep being broken again. How will I function tomorrow? I’ll never get back to sleep. Then my thoughts drift back to the issue I’m anxious about… kids, finances, short-comings, etc.

Not too long ago, I was on the hamster wheel of worry in the wee hours, running in endless circles. Then a thought broke in. Not my own thought of course… it was far too gentle for 3:00 AM to be mine. It had to be God.

Let me in.

I tried to make room for Him in my thoughts. The struggle to turn those worries into prayers finally way to sleep. In the morning when I made my way to the Word, He spoke to me. One of my favorite morning routines is to listen to scripture readings presented by a sweet sister in the Lord. (click here to listen.) God ministered to me through Psalm 24 as Summer read the passage to me three times.

 7Lift up your heads, you gates;
    be lifted up, you ancient doors,
    that the King of glory may come in.
Who is this King of glory?
    The Lord strong and mighty,
    the Lord mighty in battle.
Lift up your heads, you gates;
    lift them up, you ancient doors,
    that the King of glory may come in.
10 Who is he, this King of glory?
    The Lord Almighty—
    he is the King of glory.

As I listened, His personal word to me came through with great affection:

Your defenses are low at 3:00 AM. I let your anxiety rise from where you’ve buried it, so I can address it. Your heart is open and laid bare at that moment. Your choice is to wrestle the anxiety OR to let me in and minister to your heart. Will you close your heart to Me, or let the King of Glory come in?

Just talk to Me. Tell me your feelings and worries. Let Me comfort you and sort your feelings out for you. Let Me guide you and show you what to do. Instead of resenting the insomnia and trying to silence the anxiety, just welcome Me in and let Me help you. Embrace the moment and in no time you will be back to sleep.

Resist the urge to wrestle, to solve, to rehash or rehearse. Perhaps if you hand things to me, I may whisper answers and wisdom to you at 3:00 AM.

It’s not insomnia. It’s an invitation.

Dear friend, recognize it as an invitation to trust Him, to lay your burdens down. It’s an invitation to rest and be at peace in His presence. Let Him in.

From the archives: originally posted August 21, 2017

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