I have to come clean.  Sometimes, I get really annoyed by verses I read in the bible.  Occasionally, I read one that makes me want to stick my tongue out and whack the writer on the back of the head. (Then I remember that what is written in the bible was inspired by God, and I wouldn’t dare whack Him in the back of the head.)

I’ll give you an example.  I have always been quite annoyed with Paul’s claim in this verse:

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.   Philippians 4:11

I often think, in my most irritated, sarcastic voice, “Well, good for you, Paul.”   Clearly, the man has not faced the kinds of things that I have faced.   He has no idea how hard it is to be content in my life today.  (In case you are inclined to agree with my wayward thinking… Paul was regularly harassed, beaten, and jailed for doing God’s will.  He endured a shipwreck, a poisonous snake bite, a stoning that nearly killed him and many other terrible experiences.)

So why the ongoing annoyance with this verse?  I tried out this verse, tested it, and failed it.  I couldn’t figure out how to be content in every circumstance in my life.   Even the encouragement that comes two verses later started to seem like a fairy tale because I couldn’t manage the contentment thing:

I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.  Philippians 4:13

All things? Then why not contentment?

This weekend, at a Joyce Meyer conference, the frustration with this verse came to a screeching halt.  Joyce was talking about “change” all weekend.   In the last session, she was talking about how to do what you CAN do, and then wait for God to do what you CAN’T do.   Not just wait for Him, but actually enjoy the time while you’re waiting.    She reminded us that we are being transformed from “glory to glory.”  (2 Corinthians 4:18)    We just have no idea how much time will elapse between one glory and the next.   The breakthroughs, the victories, the provisions often come in God’s timing (not ours) and we have to wait for each glory to come.   We should have peace, joy, security in the waiting.   We can be content between glories.

This is where Philippians 4:11 came in.   She explained the verse in a way that I’ve never considered before.

First of all, Paul says that he “learned” how to live in contentment.  He didn’t get it right the first time, and probably not the second or third time.   Learning is a long process that takes time.    It takes God’s grace and power to be achieved.

The greatest insight came to me when Joyce explained that Paul wasn’t talking about being content in his rotten circumstances because God had left him there to suffer and he should make the best of it.   His contentment didn’t mean that he accepted the tremendous hardships that he was facing as the end result.

With God, glory is always the end result.

Paul was content knowing that God would come and deliver him to his next glory at the right time.  He did not accept his suffering as a permanent state.   He recognized that God always has an amazing plan to save us, teach us, transform us, and use us to display His glory.

I can have peace and still not have any clue what’s happening or what God is doing right now.   I can have peace even when my tough circumstances aren’t budging.  I can be content, knowing that God is working on my next glory and it will come at just the right time.

I’ll keep trusting Him and praising Him until it gets here.

I’ve been asked this question quite a bit lately.  It seems that my protruding baby-belly is a sign to people that I should stick to breathing and let them do the rest. Wow, do I sound irritated?  I guess I’m just an independent kind of gal.

The baggers at the grocery store have been after me for weeks to carry my groceries out. I  know, I should let them. But as long as I can do it, I’m going to continue in my self-sufficient ways. Today at the Costo gas station, the sweet employee came over and asked if he could help me pump my gas.  I declined very nicely and chuckled to myself. It’s nice to see that courtesy hasn’t left the planet completely.

As I was driving out of the gas station, I heard the question again. “Can I help you with that?”  This time it was the Lord.

I had been crying and worrying most of the morning about my little nut (my second grader).  She is struggling in school.  No doubt…. she is bright, funny, compassionate, creative, expressive in every way, and a great cook at only 8 years old.  Just not a natural-born student.  At least, not in the traditional teacher-in-front-of-thirty-kids classroom.  She is an excellent student in LIFE… whatever is hands-on and whatever involves people.  Just a little oblivious to the details.  Today, she’s not interested in our colonial history or the trivialities of math word problems.  Give her a real life problem, and she will jump at the chance to console, to help, to rescue.

I’ve been trying to help my little nut on my own.  However, my independence has not proved helpful. I’ve tried everything that I know how to do, and I think I’ve hit the wall. This morning, I realized that I haven’t reached out to the teacher as much as I should. ( I have authority issues, too.  I fear the red pen and I let it have the final word.)  I also realized that I’ve kept my hubby out of this as well.  Most of all, I haven’t been asking the Lord to help me.

I see that my independence has led to nothing good.  It’s time to open my heart.  Let go of the fears.  Let God shed His light on this situation.  Get some proper perspective.  Let Him draw my husband and my daughter’s teacher in to work on this together. Let Him carry us through this.

For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose heart is loyal to Him.            2 Chronicles 16:9 (NKJ)

He is watching all the time, to see how He can help me.  How can my heart be loyal to Him, when I am rejecting His help all the time?  Am I really abiding in Him if I’m trying to do all the work?

There are no points to be earned for doing it myself.  Only heartache.

I have so much to learn!

My last two posts have been quite long…  I just had a quick thought to share with you tonight.

The other day, I was reading my Streams in the Desert daily devotional. The subject was grief and suffering:

Sorrow causes deep scars, and indelibly writes its story on the suffering heart.  We never completely recover from our greatest griefs and are never exactly the same after having passed through them.  Yet sorrow that is endured in the right spirit impacts our growth favorably and brings us a greater sense of compassion for others.   Indeed, those who have no scars of sorrow or suffering upon them are poor.  “The joy set before” (Hebrews 12:2) us should shine on our griefs just as the sun shines through the clouds, making them radiant.          excerpt by J. R. Miller

As I read that last sentence, I immediately thought about stretch marks and scars. About how our skin is changed forever through wounds and through the physical toll of pregnancy.  How sometimes the scar tissue is shiny and smooth, and catches the light.  If you think about it, stretch marks and scars can truly appear radiant when the light shines on them.

Strange thought, I know.  You might not agree that your marks are radiant.  However, I’m sure that this inspirational perspective came from God.  He shines through my scars.  His provision and grace shine through my stretch marks.  These etchings on my body and my heart mean something.  They are a message to me and to the world that God can take the most painful things and bring something good out of them.

Will you let Him shine through your scars?